For Damen

[bells_will_ring]

The first glimpse that Erasmus had of a man other than his teachers or fellow slaves was of a palace guard. He had been tall and strong and so commanding that Erasmus had thought he’d been one of the Masters from the Palace, perhaps even Prince Damianos himself.

“A Master?” his caretaker Pylaeus had scoffed, kindly, “That was a soldier of your retinue, sent to protect your litter. He is to your Master as a single droplet to the great storm that comes from the ocean and splits open the sky.”

Erasmus imagines that even as he was struck down, Prince Damianos had been glorious and strong and Erasmus himself unworthy. He would have been unworthy even before Kallias’s betrayal, his lie about their kiss that doomed Erasmus to this new life. He is tainted goods and as Damen said, being sent to Vere was a punishment. Being forced into a cage, being sullied as far as a slave can be sullied, being burned and beaten, it was all a punishment for allowing himself to become dirty and unworthy of his fallen Prince. Whatever this latest torture is, is all part of the same. It is now his life.

He does not struggle, as he is led towards court by the young, beautiful boy it is rumored is kept by the Prince Regent himself. He’s told only that he is to ‘perform’ for court and he tries to calm his wildly beating heart as he half-listens to the cheers and gasps of the crowd from whatever feat is happening just outside. He may be tainted goods, but he is still a slave of Akielos and will act as such. He is a slave and this slave lives to serve in whatever capacity he is told, regardless of who or what their Master may be. It is not his place, to question or judge a Master, he is only a slave, he is only a slave…

He repeats this to himself, concentrating on his breathing as the door is thrown open, a commanding voice ordering the room cleared. A flash of bright, blonde hair is enough to send him prostrate, trembling at the attention of the Prince, whose beauty is so unlike what Erasmus had expected from a Master, but no less striking.

“Rise and listen carefully,” Prince Laurent orders, speaking to him with a directness that Erasmus does not deserve. To be singled out like this by royalty is astonishing and he forces himself to pay attention.
“I will not say more but if you can face what is about to happen to you with bravery, something good may happen. Call upon your training and steel yourself.”

Erasmus does not understand, stares at the Prince’s retreating back with wonder for several minutes until he is yanked forward by his leash into the performance arena. He rights himself only to see flames, flames all around him whirling casually on the ends of some sort of torturous pole and eyes all around him, trained on him as he stumbles, legs betraying him as he goes to his knees. They are going to burn him, again. They are going to ruin the other leg.

He must be brave, he thinks, tears clouding his vision as his fear of what fresh torture this will be nearly wipes out his perfect training and the Prince’s own command. He is a slave and this slave lives to serve, he lives to serve, he lives…

His breath catches as his vision clears, wide, hazel eyes blinking at what surrounds him.
He has gone mad. People swarm around him, in strange costume, grass underneath his knees. Towering structures of stone rise around him and all manner of terrors surround him. This is not Vere and he has gone mad.

Comments

[princekiller]

Fresh from the market, Damen carried several bags weighed down with a variety of fruits and vegetables and packaged meats. He had attempted a number of meals as outlined in the cook book he had purchased weeks previous and he looked to trying another tonight, hoping that eventually he might become so skilled in at least one recipe as to share it with Laurent.

So far, he'd yet to manage anything he might deem worthy of sharing with anyone, much less Laurent, but Damen refused to stop trying.

And it wasn't as though he lacked time in this place.

The distance between his dwelling and the nearest market was a mere mile at most and Damen enjoyed the time in the fresh air though the creeping chill was something he'd not grown accustomed to as of yet. It would only get colder, he'd been told, a fact Damen could hardly fathom though it did somehow seem inevitable. He'd taken to covering his arms, even, replacing the article of clothing referred to here as a tank top with a shirt bearing sleeves of Laurent's typical length.

It was certainly too cold now to be wearing a chiton as the boy knelt in the grass--

Damen stopped, eyes falling wide as he realized what he was seeing. The boy looked terrified, trembling as he stared about at the people walking past. Damen had seen this boy before, seen him looking nearly as scared then as he did now.

'Erasmus,' he breathed, walking carefully closer, movements slow as to not scare him further.

[bells_will_ring]

Erasmus raises his eyes slowly, focusing on the familiar voice and face as he tries to will his body to stop shaking.

"I believe I have been drugged," he murmurs tightly. Perhaps this is what the Prince was warning him against. Perhaps this is the test he needs to pass to receive whatever good thing he was promised.

"Are we still at court? Are they still watching me?"

[princekiller]

He spoke in Akielon, the familiar tongue sending a comforting warmth all through Damen even as it made the anxiety under his skin harden. This was undeniably the boy he'd seen some months ago, the one who'd been intended for him once upon a time.

'You have not been drugged,' Damen assured him, carefully setting his heavy bags in the grass as he lowered himself into a crouch and offered a hand. 'And you are not in court. Is that the last thing you remember?'

[bells_will_ring]

Erasmus squeezes Damen's hand letting his presence calm him. He has always been a commanding figure, clearly not a slave by birth and so much closer to the Masters Erasmus had learned about.

"I was made to go in front of court and there was...there was fire. It was some type of diversion and I shamed myself. I was unable to keep myself under control and I shamed Akielos."

[princekiller]

'Yes,' Damen replied because, even after many months and many experiences since then, he could remember that feast well. Most especially the expert way Laurent had negotiated with Torveld. Then, to avoid the likelihood of Erasmus misinterpreting his words, Damen quickly added, 'Yes, there was fire but you did not shame Akielos. You were very, very brave.'

Ducking his head somewhat, he tried to catch Erasmus's eyes, his hand still wrapped warmly around the boy's. 'This will sound impossible, I know, but you're no longer at court,' he continued, carefully rising to his feet and urging Erasmus to rise with him. 'In fact, you're no longer in Vere. This is a new place. A new world. It's called Darrow.'

[bells_will_ring]

"Were we sold, again?" he asks, not knowing whether he is feeling relief or trepidation. He lets Erasmus pull him up, the still healing skin of his leg twinging.

"Do we have a new Master? The Prince, Laurent, he came to me and warned me. He was...he was so kind. I think it would be very good, if he were our Master. Is he here?"

[princekiller]

Erasmus did not know Damen's true identity, a fact that, for the moment, Damen intended to not leave unchanged.

Instead, he nodded, remembering how Erasmus had referred to Laurent as kind even back in Vere, back before Damen could easily agree with him. He said, 'Yes, he's been here some weeks. But he is not your master, nor is he mine. This is a new world, Erasmus, one without slavery.'

He chose his words carefully and stopped short of explaining further. A boy like Erasmus, a boy trained as he was from birth in pure obedience and submission could be lost in a world like this, of that much Damen was certain. There might be no easing into a change as great as this, but Damen would try his hardest. 'How are you feeling?' he asked then, still watching Erasmus carefully. 'Do you need anything?'

[bells_will_ring]

Erasmus lets go of Damen's hand, blood running cold at his words. That is not how it works and such declarations could get a slave killed if he were overheard.

"Just because we are not yet claimed, does not mean we are not slaves," he says, hands starting to shake at the notion. "If the Prince no longer wants me as his slave, I must find a new Master. I am a slave, I am born to this. Is there, is there a boarding house of some sort. I have no coin but there are ways to pay that I am sure are the same across lands," he chokes out, trying to steady his breath at the idea of how such payments will have to be made.

[princekiller]

Erasmus's response was not surprising, but still Damen

'You'll have been assigned a dwelling,' Damen said, remembering the packet he'd been led to his first day and the one Laurent had found upon his own arrival. 'And provided money. Come,' he added, not reaching for Erasmus's hand this time though his tone was firm, commanding in a way he knew Erasmus would respond to. 'The train station is not far from here. Are you okay to walk?'

[bells_will_ring]

"Yes," he answers, shoulders dropping in relief at Damen's command. Erasmus thinks that in another life, he would have made a fine Master but he cannot imagine he makes a proper slave at all. He is unsure what to make of a land that provides slaves with coin and shelter but he doesn't dare question it, so grateful to have someone taking some measure of care for him.

"Do you also live in this same dwelling?" he asks, unable to keep the hope out of his voice. "Are there other slaves that can teach me the protocol of this place? I must find a new Master but I...I would not mind it if it were not the Regent. I found it difficult to endure in the way they wanted of me."

[princekiller]

There would be no telling if Damen shared the same building as Erasmus until they found the strange packet of papers, but Damen kept that to himself as he led the boy toward the train station. Fortunately, it was not a far walk.

'There is no Regent here,' Damen told him instead, glancing over as Erasmus walked along beside him, wholly out of place in this world in his blue chiton. More than a few people stared as they passed. 'And no king,' he added, trying to keep his voice quiet and reassuring. 'As I said, this is a different world with different customs. You will have no master, Erasmus. You are free here.'

[bells_will_ring]

Erasmus keeps his eyes trained firmly on the ground in front of him, not daring to make eye contact with anyone but Damen until he can understand the society better.

He stumbles a bit at Damen's words, quickly righting himself as he tries to make sense of the words.

"That is not how it works," he says carefully, feeling foolishly hesitant to argue with someone of his own rank. "The Prince is a Prince by birth no matter the customs of the land. I am a slave in the same way. I am equipped only to be a slave, I am not able to be my own Master. Such a thing is impossible. Do you truly consider yourself your own Master?"

[princekiller]

Erasmus was not wrong, not by the laws and customs of Akielos.

But it was not the way of things in Vere, not entirely at least. And it was certainly not the way of things in this strange city. Damen need only make that clear.

'Yes,' he replied because Damen had never felt anything like a slave even when he'd been one. 'I am and now so are you.' Carefully, he reached over then to rest his hand on Erasmus's shoulder as they walked. 'It is difficult to comprehend, I know that. But you are more than simply a slave, Erasmus. You always have been.'

[bells_will_ring]

Erasmus is, if anything, now less than a slave but Damen seems so sure and Erasmus suspects that is true for Damen. Damen has always been more than simply a slave.

"This slave is no longer fit for service to a Prince, regardless," he murmurs, raising his eyes up to Damen. "You do not understand, I don't think. It was an honor, to be trained for Prince Damianos. It was such a great honor. But I was sent away and now I am ruined. Perhaps this is best."

He cannot feel those words, not in his heart, he is so heavy with fear and shame. But there is no other course. He is not fit for court and now there are no Masters to be found. He is nothing, in this place.

[princekiller]

It had been many, many months since anyone had spoken his name in such a manner. Here, he was only Damen. Very few knew his true name, his full name. Fewer still knew his station. Or what his station had once been.

Even Laurent had spoken the name of Damianos only a handful of times, and ever with the marker of Prince before it.

Now, Damen felt himself flinch at the sound of it and tightening his grip briefly on Erasmus's shoulder as he slowed their progress. 'Erasmus,' he said, his voice still quiet but firm as he moved to stand before the boy. 'You were not ruined, do you hear me? What was done to you was not your fault.' He paused then, only for a moment as he weighed the options in his mind before continuing. 'I have been brought here from a time later than yours,' he said. 'I know the Prince of Vere's plans for you and the execution of them. Would you like to hear?'

[bells_will_ring]

"It is not a question of fault, I am a slave to be used as it pleases my Master," he insists, although none of it was like he'd imagined and it still frightens him, what was done. It frightens him how afraid he had been and how little control he'd had over himself.

He frowns as Damen's words not understanding why he would be in the Prince's confidence. "Only if the Prince would allow it," he says, the cold beginning to make itself known across his bare skin. "That he spoke to me at all was a great honor, one I hardly know what to do with. He is truly a great man."

[princekiller]

Though Erasmus's words were true to Akielon culture, Damen still found himself cringing. He made no effort to correct or argue this time, however, nodding only instead.

'The Prince has no control over me,' Damen stated, moving to stand before Erasmus and watching him carefully. The statement was not quite true, though the power Laurent had over him was not one Damen wished to share, certainly not with a boy. A boy once intended to be his slave.

'He negotiated with Torveld of Patras,' he said, once again keeping his tone quiet and calm. 'You and many other slaves were transported back with him, away from the Regent and his men. You served there and Torveld... Torveld was good to you. He treated you as you deserved.'

[bells_will_ring]

"I had a Master," Erasmus breathes. Not only that, he apparently had a kind Master and instead of fulfilling that reality, he is here where his worth is even lower than he ever dreamed.

"And what about you, Damen? Were you dismissed from service or...Damen, did you run? Even he is not in his own land, that cannot stand with the Prince."

[princekiller]

It was a complicated question and Damen found himself torn between wanting to provide Erasmus with the truth and not wanting to shake him further. Telling the boy of Torveld felt suddenly cruel and he frowned at himself, considering his words more carefully.

'I ran, yes,' he confessed, his tone still quiet. 'My plan for escape was not successful, but that was well before my arrival to this place. Here there is no running.' His frown deepened then, his hand still heavy atop Erasmus's shoulder. He squeezed again, gently. 'There is no running here, do you understand me? You will not find a Master here because there are none. Just as there is no kingdom. Laurent is here, but he is no more of a prince than you or I.'

[bells_will_ring]

Erasmus cannot imagine how Damen has managed to escape punishment for this long, especially with the Prince in the same place. He drops his gaze as Damen uses the Prince's name so informally, wondering at the boldness of this man.

He is, indeed, no slave.

"I understand the words," he confesses, hands clenching as he fights to speak of himself in such a direct way. It is appallingly inappropriate and he feels very ill prepared for a world outside of Akielon walls.

"But I do not know anything but service. I don't...I only know how to please and be pleasing. And I was sent away for falling short of even that standard. I don't know what to do," he finishes, eyes stinging as he thinks of a life without even the company of other slaves. He will have to be a pet, if anyone will have him, or worse.

[princekiller]

The boy's eyes dropped at the mere mention of Laurent by name and Damen frowned, watching with a mounting dread as Erasmus seemed to cave inward upon himself, his delicate shoulders hunched.

Damen slid his hand to Erasmus's nape and ducked down, his voice gentle once more. 'Then you will learn,' he said, his tone quiet but firm. 'Not how to please, but how to exist as a free man, how to make your own choices and live your own life. Tell me, do you think you can try?'

[bells_will_ring]

Erasmus does not think he can, not at all but he knows it is what Damen wants to hear, what he wants of him so he nods, the heavy weight of his hand grounding him.

"Must I live alone?" he asks, unable to keep some of the hope out of his voice. Perhaps Damen needs a servant, if not a slave. Perhaps he knows of someone who could use him in such a way. "I could serve in the ways acceptable to this custom in exchange for board and even coin if they insist. That is not the same as being a slave, correct, if I earn my keep? I could...I could prepare simple foods or clean or anything that is required of me, I will learn."

[princekiller]

Damen allowed a smile then, relaxing slightly as Erasmus appeared to be somewhat calmed. 'They have a word for that here,' he explained, giving Erasmus's shoulder another brief squeeze before leading him once more toward the train station. 'It's called a job or work. Essentially the same as having a trade in our world though the opportunities are more vast.'

He was quiet for a moment then, thinking over all he could further tell Erasmus. All he should. Then said, 'You will be assigned a dwelling. As far as I know, there are no rules stating you must reside there, but that space will be specifically set aside for you. Would it be a greater comfort to you to stay with me for some time?'

[bells_will_ring]

Erasmus breathes an immediate sigh of relief, hand reaching up to clutch Damen's wrist as though he might rescind the offer or disappear altogether.

"This-" he catches himself, knowing that his traditional response would displease Damen, for reasons Erasmus is yet to understand. "I would draw much comfort from your presence. You are not truly a slave, I've always known that, but you know proper customs even if you do not follow them. I have never been without another slave, before. Only...only for brief moments in Vere and it was difficult. It was difficult to be around those who did not understand our customs."

He carefully expels the memories of the Regent's guards and men taking what they wanted of him and straightens up, hoping he appears steady and less of a burden.

[princekiller]

Damen didn't miss Erasmus correcting himself and quietly hid a smile. He wasn't at all surprised that the boy could learn and likely learn well. Palace slaves were carefully picked for a reason and if Erasmus had truly been intended for the rightful future King of Akielos, he was undoubtedly the very best the kingdom had to offer.

'You'll not have that same experience here,' Damen assured him then, all too aware of just what Erasmus had suffered under the Regent's court. 'I'll make sure of it.'

'And you'll stay with me,' he added, knowing Erasmus would not do well on his own just yet. 'At least for a time. But not as a slave in any way, do you understand?'

[bells_will_ring]

He cuts his eyes away for a moment, too ashamed that Damen knows very well what had been done, how sullied Erasmus truly was. He cannot imagine Damen would have been used in such a way, although he would not have been in a position to refuse.

He would have fought though, Erasmus knows, and something about that defiance is admirable although it ought to be nothing but.

A loud rumble cuts through the momentary silence as they round a corner, Erasmus stopping suddenly as something large and metallic blows past them at speeds not topped even by the fastest horses he's seen. It heads into the building in front of them. "I understand," he murmurs, only half listening as he takes in the scene with wide eyes. He is so thankful Damen is not leaving him alone that it takes all of his training not to sink to his knees in gratitude. He was not made for this world.

[princekiller]

It was hardly Damen's first time encountering the giant metal beast as it sped past them, but it was still breathtaking and terrifying in equal amounts. Erasmus went still at his side, staring with wide eyes and rooted to the spot as the clamor of metal and metal filled the air.

Neither of them moved until the thing had passed, at which point Damen gave Erasmus a playful nudge with his elbow. 'It's called a train,' he explained, encouraging Erasmus to walk with him. 'There are much small versions with wheels called cars. Incredible things, honestly. Ten times as fast as a horse. Everything here moves much more quickly, but you'll grow accustomed to it, Erasmus. I know you will.'

And it was Damen's hope that he could live a better life here than he could've had even in Patras. Though he supposed that would depend largely upon Erasmus himself.

[bells_will_ring]

"If this is not a kingdom, who rules this great place?" he asks, taking careful steps closer to the building.

"What do you do here, if not service? Are you a soldier? I always thought, privately, that you had been a soldier. You are not trained as a slave, we all knew that."

[princekiller]

'Someone called a mayor,' Damen explained as they approached the station. It was a large building, though smaller than the palace at Ios and not nearly so grand. It served a function, however. A purpose. And for that alone Damen found it impressive. 'He's elected, it seems. Chosen by the people and not by lineage.'

That was very much an idea Damen was still struggling to understand, but he kept that to himself for now.

He glanced over the question, recognizing yet another opportunity for honesty. And still he hesitated. What would it do to this boy to learn that the man he'd spent his entire life groomed to serve now stood before him? Particularly now that Damen had invited him into his home.

Damen had been without his slaves for well over half a year and had no desire to obtain any now regardless of legality.

'I was indeed a soldier,' he supplied after a moment because that wasn't entirely a lie. 'I was captured and sent to Vere as a slave, a gift to the Prince though he did not particularly want me. They consider slavery barbaric, as you know. Beneath them. Even as the populate their court with child pets.'

[bells_will_ring]

"I was sent as punishment," he confesses, eyes cutting over to Damen's steady and kind face. Damen may not be a slave, may not have been born into the same rank, but he is not court and Erasmus does not think he would judge him so very harshly. "For being considered sullied. A boy kissed me, a friend. I was to remain pure for the Prince, but that is long past."

He gathers himself, trying to square his shoulders to seem to have the strength he'd promised Damen he would find. "You should not have been forced into a role you had not trained for. To be a palace slave is a great honor, the highest honor, but you had not been trained. And they did not understand our training."

[princekiller]

Damen was quiet a moment as he considered some of the discussions he and Laurent had engaged in, the arguments Damen had made in defense of Akielon slaves and the practice itself. And Laurent's counters.

'Would you have chosen it?' he asked finally, slowing as they reached the platform of the train station. 'Had you not been born into such a way of life, do you think you still would have elected to become a palace slave?'

[bells_will_ring]

"That is not how it works," Erasmus says, brow furrowing as he tries to even imagine such a thing. "It was my destiny. I was born with the qualities desired in a slave and I trained hard. It was an honor. The Prince would have cared for me and I would have been fulfilled. It's not a choice."

[princekiller]

Erasmus was not wrong, but still Damen released a slightly frustrated breath.

It occurred to him that it was indeed a stupid question. Erasmus couldn't fathom choosing anything but what he'd been born into. Damen himself could hardly fathom being anything but King of Akielos. Even now, even here.

As before, he discovered that he and Erasmus were really not so different.

'Come,' he said instead, nodding toward the booth at the far end of the platform. 'We will gather your packet and see about your dwelling. You'll need more clothing as well,' he said, nodding down to his own long pair of denim pants and shirt. 'The fashion also takes some getting used to.'